It is supposed to help with my recollection, ability to pay attention and basically all the cognitive shit those little Lyme bugs ate away from me. However, the doctor warned me that things could get worse instead. Why does that seem to be a common theme in my medications. “Here, take this. You’ll break out, have emotional meltdowns, 28 hour headaches and an inability to walk somedays, but I promise eventualllly you’ll feel better.” I’ve lived with Lyme for so long that I rather just live the life I’ve become accustom to; not make myself worse to get better. 

I should feel blessed that I have access to medication and doctors who care about me and listen and family who loves me and understands but my god, this is fucking difficult.